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Old Aug 14, 2017   #241
DiuwayBuns
Senior Member
 
4th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,093



lets go for 1 more bump because yeah
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Old Aug 16, 2017   #242
DiuwayBuns
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,093



oh look im trying
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Old Aug 18, 2017   #243
Dezrai
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6th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 421



this is pretty alright BUT

its boring
the dm pattern is very boring especially, i've seen a lot of replays that are a split, followed by an upper torso boom which i think i am also guilty of doing at some point
if anything were to make the shit dm pattern redeeming it would have to be really creative movement, or just perfect refinery to the point where you cant find a flaw but none of those were really present here so it looks pretty low effort!

the opener was good except for your right leg, specifically the knee, twitch looked bad

good movement up to the split, and nice little grab transition too, its aight but it's not enough to be impressive or anything yknow

not much to say about the grab and boom other than; nice symmetry but the arm you grabbed with twitches like shit before you kick, which i assume is bc u were fucking with the position of the torso and ur foot and ended up focusing on the dm a lot more than the movement

awesome pose! i like relaxed al of mine jonts after disemberenent...

in quality this replay is better than your last, but in your last atleast you thought of a little concept which was the grab switching spin thing and went with it, and the concept + your attempt of it is a lot more interesting than this, so i prefer your last replay, but if u could get to a point where u could do what u did in ur last replay but as smoothly as everything u did in this replay it'd be real nice
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Old Aug 18, 2017   #244
MagnusSol
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Blue Belt
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 127



it's not bad per se.

it's just a little bland and as dezrai said, even a botched attempt at something cool is oftentimes better than something too clean and seen too often

I caant offer much cnc for madmans but youre not bad and you have good movement but you lack ideas and good dm patterns

(btw the thread I was talking to jingles about was this one tho I thank you for your kind words on my other one: http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...=562604&page=5 )
Climbing like you've never seen before (parody of xlr84life's thread):
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...44#post9187844
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Old Aug 19, 2017   #245
MrJingles
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5th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 8,668



Personally, I enjoyed this one. Much more than the two above me I see lol

Opener into the split was really cool and slick

transition wasn't the best, but it got you to where you needed to be for the big kick (which was cool considering you didn't get the pecs just the arms and neck which is pretty rare these days)


While the dm pattern is quite common, I don't think you should actively try and avoid it. I tend to make a lot of these types of replays for practicing purposes to see the many ways I can continue a replay after a split or something so they aren't always bad.

However, if you do take a generic dm route, its crucial to make sure to make the replay your own. Like dezrai said above try and do some creative stuff as well so your replays can stand out above others.

Overall I found it well done for what its worth.

Also remember you can make another replay based off openers of previous replays so you can practice different stuff without all the work of making a new opener /o/

or just steal someone else's opener /o/ (ask first)
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