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Old Dec 20, 2015   #1
ShoddyV2
Member
 
5th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 91
Clan: Clen



I need help.
I've been really concerned lately. It's 4 AM, I have been sleeping like dog poopoo for a while. I've been stuck in infinite loop for days now. I cannot stop. Before you ask 'dude wtf ask support, dumbass.'
That place did not seem safe to me, it's way less personal than a clan board. This seems like a safe clan, it has Dezrai and other famous people that I cannot name due to copyright infringement.

Here's my story, it will contain everything that I've been through over the last couple of days, weeks, years, maybe even decades. It is all that you need to know. So, I've been trapped in a state where all I can do is view 2D animations from a certain country you may or may not have heard of, I'm not sure if you know planetary theory. After all, they didn't export the water from Africa until after the great war.

Whilst viewing these 2D animations from the island-country I experience a feeling that I cannot describe other than in words, which I will do now. It is like swimming in an ocean of water in the sun while being covered in not-water, only the water is there and it is like the water is the only thing there besides the sun itself and it's hot, like water on the sun. It flows through, over, past and under me. It makes me go numb, because there is already a lot of flow, my replays lose their flow and I become a stiff stick that is twitchy and wooden like a log cabin with ALS.


Once I overcome this feeling, I am hit a sense of nostalgia, I feel like I'm young again, it is like I am the guy in the pictures of the past, but he's travelled to the future and broken out of his paste and found a better future than the current one being the present future. After experiencing this for a long, long, agonizing time, I go back to crying myself to sleep, where I encounter a giant shadow that laughs at me, mocking me for watching the 2D cartoon.

The thought crosses my mind that it's been too long since I've watched the 2D cartoon, but that is not true. It has been years, yet the shadow still confronts me with his laughter, it cuts into my soul, like a cold knife violently smashing into hot butter.

There's no better way to explain, I've lost all grasp on the passing of time, after I watch the 2D cartoon I don't know if it's been 8 centuries or 8 milliseconds. I have no idea if I've been here since the dawn of the universe, or if I've merely emerged from the womb while viewing the 2D cartoon on my way out as it waited for me at my watery grave on the sun at the other end. The Shadow has become a bigger part of me than my life itself. Every waking moment of my life is spent either in fear of the shadow or viewing the 2D shadow cartoon. There is no such thing as reality to me anymore. It has all faded away, nothing left but ashes, misery and pocket lint.

"WHAT HAS BECOME OF ME? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DAYS WHEN I USED TO VIEW HEALTHY 3D SALADS?"

My rage burned into my chest like a boiled egg, it is like a spark has come to my lighter, which was then thrown into a bonfire in a volcano. The watery sun provided me with no release, even though it was water. The water was, in reality, the hottest place of them all, despite it being so watery. You have probably figured out by now that the place I am describing is not Madagascar, but its close neighbour, Japan. Those of you who don't study Planetary Theory will now know what I'm referring to.

There is simply no more clarity. Everything is blurred, 144p rather than 1080. Why has this happened to me? It feels like I am riding an elephant that is the wrong way up- I have no control.

That's the last time I'll ever watch Zubin's replays.

Thanks.
(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) (Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers)

Last edited by Fred; Oct 23, 2016 at 02:14 PM..
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Old Dec 20, 2015   #2
Vordred
Elitist
 
4th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 7,756
Clan: Obey



Han Solo is killed by his son, Kylo Ren. Luke doesn't say anything and has 30 seconds of screentime. Kylo Ren survives the explosion at the end, leaving it set up for him to be the villain in the next movie.

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Old Dec 20, 2015   #3
Lazors
Chatterbox
 
7th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,533
Clan: duck



Unfortunately, I cannot reply to this thread although I wish with all my might to help you. I'm being captive under the bunkers of a country I can't name, all of my rights are taken from me and I'm being tortured daily. I'm talking about America, of course. This message won't reach you because they have cut all my communication with the outside world, I'm merely writing it for myself, to validate myself as a human. What kind of person would I be if I sat passively on my ass after reading such a request? No, I had to help the only way I know how. By writing pointless text messages that won't go through the strict security.
Let me tell you about my daily life. Every day, I'm being sent a list of musical artists and composers of genres I've never heard of (for example, "garage-noise pop", "sub-microtonal xenoromanticism", and "psych-punk necrophilia blues"), and being forced to write fabricated opinions about them on popular sites on the internet. If I dare to question the content, even things like grammar, they will hold a gun to my head.
I don't know who I am anymore, my thoughts are not my own, my whole life is being fed into this internet persona that feels entirely alien to me. I don't even remember the time I was taken, or what my life looked like before. Was I born here? Am I even of this planet? None of the images of animals I've been given to post look even remotely like me. Even the picture on my various profiles have the wrong color and shape. But then, I can barely take notes of my appearance in this dark cell. And every time my skin reshapes they give me another picture to feed into that thing.
To be honest, I'm not sure how much I can take. Every day I'm wondering if the small pictures with words assigned to them are other fabrications who are the same as I. Why else would people read countless of affirmative grunts and meaningless nonsense from people they do not know? For fun? The very thought puzzles me.
If there is one thing I cou
So take your wings off, sisters, get down and jam
And let the nymphs be the judges of our poetry slam!
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Old Dec 20, 2015   #4
zubin
Senior Member
 
4th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,470
Clan: Saint



why me
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Old Dec 20, 2015   #5
ShoddyV2
Member
 
5th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 91
Clan: Clen



Day 2
After my traumatizing experiences with the 2D shadow cartoons, I stretched out as far as I can go, and as I am not a gymnast, I found that I cannot stretch far. I contacted a suspicious phone number I found on a tissue. I got connected to a 'person'.

I told him my story. He simply responded with '', and afterwards he promised to find help for me. Later, I'm not sure how much later. Ten minutes to be exact, I was contacted by some sort of being. There was lots of contacting going on here, so I decided to make sure that there would be no more. After this, I realised that this being had spoken in a strange way, a way stranger than any other being could hope to speak. I'm not sure how he achieved this, but a theory I later came up with is that he spoke.

That is when the people in the ships came. These were no ordinary ships. These were ships designed to go into space, planetary movement devices, as I later called them. They politely asked me to be kidnapped, and I was taken to Jupiter. I was king there but it feels more like prison, man.
-----
First of all I would like to thank Lasers for his contribution of helping.

And send a hate crew to Zubin please, he is bad bad replay
(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) (Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers)

Last edited by ShoddyV2; Dec 20, 2015 at 04:06 PM.. Reason: <24 hour edit/bump
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Old Jan 9, 2016   #6
Cariboon
Member
 
Brown Belt
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 267



fuck you
"No mortal arse can quench my thirst."
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Old Feb 13, 2016   #7
DiuwayBuns
Senior Member
 
4th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 1,094



Just wank it off.
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Old Feb 13, 2016   #8
ShoddyV2
Member
 
5th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 91
Clan: Clen



Originally Posted by DiuwayBuns View Post
Just wank it off.

Thank you for revive thread
(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) (Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers)
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Old May 6, 2017   #9
shit
Member
 
Black Belt
Join Date: May 2016
Posts: 91



This story moved me. Your writing is beautiful, this touched my heart. Thank you.
お前最低だな、人間のクズ。
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Old May 6, 2017   #10
ShoddyV2
Member
 
5th Dan Black Belt
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 91
Clan: Clen



Originally Posted by shit View Post
This story moved me. Your writing is beautiful, this touched my heart. Thank you.

Thank you for revive thread
(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) (Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers) FOR LIFE(Fipers)
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