So's, I recently ran into this pretty cool guy named FL Studio, who a girl I met at a party at Internet's house showed me. This cool guy, FL Studio, gets made fun of a bit, but he's really cool to jam with and stuff.

However, I'm still learning the ins and outs of this pretty cool guy who spouts loops and doesn't afraid of anything (), and also of a cheap/free little harlot named Windows Movie Maker, who doesn't know a lot of moves, but is still user-friendly, .

So, like, dudes, it'd be pretty sweet if you could give this fifty-eight second test run a view and tell me of a few other programs/features on these programs that could enhance something like this. Note that, although it is a test, I have a little inkling in the back of my mind of expanding this to a 20 minute sorta film-type-thing, once I get in contact with a person whose camera isn't in the lowest percentile of the technological bellcurve.

Without further ado:

A few times, the words seem tacky, but I like the direction.
Possibly add some rhythm.

Tacky, like lame? Or is that some other sound production term I have yet to be introduced to? I'm rather new to this kind of composing/producing.

Well, with rhythm, I think it would be good on other tracks/later in the track, but there's a certain feel (at least, as I see it) of disorientation without a defined rhythm in the track. It's less techno and more...I dunno, maybe dark ambient, maybe creepout ambient, maybe post-fusion dancejazz rock polka (okay, that last one TOTALLY is a joke). Still, I know what you mean by rhythm, and I do think that, at some point, if the track were to be continued, it would require some semblance of a 'beat' (there's a wonderful hit effect that sounds ominous in a lower register, I could maybe use that.)

Some of the time, the words sound interesting, but other times they sound stupid.

For rhythm, I would fade in some krautrock-y drums, or even just volume adjust some brown noise to a beat.

pretty much this. i wasn't really entertained, which is pretty much the point of a video. :l

I don't expect it to appeal to many people, honestly. The main point is to display both a aural and visual negative space; empty and rather oppressive. That's why I shy away from the idea of having rhythm or 'Krautrock' style drums. More of a soundscape.

/end pretentiousB.S.

Okay, it would really help if you told me WHEN they're corny or stupid, not just that they were. I, honestly, had found nothing wrong with it, and am having a hard time seeing exactly where a person would think they're lame (because I can only conceive of a person hating all of it or none of it.)

The low voice around 41s. I love the higher pitched glitching voices, but the lower one is a little wonky.
Also, you should probably distort the first part or something.

For when you extend it, if you do, you should probably build up. Like, start calmer, and get more intense and then have a climax, and then de-intensify.

Edit: Also, it's your art, don't feel like you need to care what I think.

To clarify, heres a song that I think does a good job at the build up:

Ah, thank you. It was starting to bug me how nonspecific it was getting, to be perfectly honest. I actually thought you were going to hate the glitchy high-pitched ones (after six listen-throughs I was getting annoyed by it, when I first proofed the track), but the lower voice could be considered kinda corny.

And, yes, definitely need a gradient for the track when I extend it. However, I might switch stuff up, JUST TO BE A DICK!

And, thanks. The one problem that every person who makes art (or whatever they want to call art, wink) is learning to take criticism. I'll give my reasons for doing something, and for not thinking something would work well, but when I ask for criticism I expect it.

Also, for the link: I CAN'T SEE IT IN THE FORUMS! I got the link with the reply, but I think embed code makes it show in the forums?

Whoops, forgot to do it right. Fixed now.

Cool. I see it now. And, yeah, I know about thematic build-up. You can invert the build-up arc, though, and spike it in different areas; it all depends on the mood you're trying to cultivate. But that song does do a wonderful job of building up.