Original Post
Tori-Investigation: Lumps and Miniguns
(recommended to be read with Morgan Freeman's voice)
Gather around, children, for uncle sid is here to share a story about a great man who once lived. Or perhaps many men. Or maybe no men at all. Could it be a woman? You know what, fuck it, I'm sid and I'm here to talk to you about lumpysolo, who many of you may know as Gavin Ember, CEO, Ex. CEO, founder, employee, and part-time janitor of a company whose name varies around Eurosoft.
For maximum authenticity, all references in this thread are completely unedited of content, so be prepared for a really long read.
It all started in a bright day of 2011. I had just finished doing stuff sids do when a user called lumpysolo approached me applying to be a blogger. His application was nothing short of amazing.
Seeing lumpysolo's potential as one of the greatest minds of whatever generation he's come from, I understood that I could not hold him back, therefore I eventually refused him stating that I had nothing left to teach him.
I thought that was the last of him that I would see in a while, but I found myself mistaken. A few months later, Lumpysolo approached me with a rough draft of his application to [Pure]
After reviewing his application, lumpysolo eventually came back to me with a rather discerning confession.
After that, I did not know what to do. I panicked! I needed to uncover EVERYTHING.
I started with discovering what languages lumpysolo did speak, and my results were less than wonderful.
While figuring out rather lumpysolo knew any languages outside of English, I accidently stumbled upon an even sweeter gem, the truth about lumpysolo's status through hamps himself.
I was absolutely shocked. I needed to find out what else there was to lumpysolo's life. I needed to know WHERE was his life. That was when I contacted RayA75.
Clearly, lumpysolo was neither Russian nor did he know it.
As the days went by, my quest to finding out about lumpysolo's past eventually ended, with many precious loots gathered along the way.
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...45#post4878045
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...80#post4890480
http://forum.toribash.com/showpost.p...0&postcount=12
http://forum.toribash.com/showpost.p...6&postcount=14
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...05#post5371305
With all this information, I wish to end my post with an act of mercy. If lumpysolo is capable of producing enough evidence to prove that this thread is bollocks, I will publicly apologize to both him and the community before posting uncountable amounts of cocks throughout the forum, ultimately resulting in my permanent ban.
It was an honor to serve this great community today, and with that I say goodbye.
Gather around, children, for uncle sid is here to share a story about a great man who once lived. Or perhaps many men. Or maybe no men at all. Could it be a woman? You know what, fuck it, I'm sid and I'm here to talk to you about lumpysolo, who many of you may know as Gavin Ember, CEO, Ex. CEO, founder, employee, and part-time janitor of a company whose name varies around Eurosoft.
For maximum authenticity, all references in this thread are completely unedited of content, so be prepared for a really long read.
It all started in a bright day of 2011. I had just finished doing stuff sids do when a user called lumpysolo approached me applying to be a blogger. His application was nothing short of amazing.
Lumpysolo's blogger application
Seeing lumpysolo's potential as one of the greatest minds of whatever generation he's come from, I understood that I could not hold him back, therefore I eventually refused him stating that I had nothing left to teach him.
you're awful, eat shit and die
I thought that was the last of him that I would see in a while, but I found myself mistaken. A few months later, Lumpysolo approached me with a rough draft of his application to [Pure]
Lumpysolo presenting me with his [Pure] application
Lumpysolo's [Pure] application
Lumpysolo eventually admitting to having an internet persona
After that, I did not know what to do. I panicked! I needed to uncover EVERYTHING.
I started with discovering what languages lumpysolo did speak, and my results were less than wonderful.
lumpysolo's full irc discussion with me
While figuring out rather lumpysolo knew any languages outside of English, I accidently stumbled upon an even sweeter gem, the truth about lumpysolo's status through hamps himself.
Lumpysolo not being a dev
I was absolutely shocked. I needed to find out what else there was to lumpysolo's life. I needed to know WHERE was his life. That was when I contacted RayA75.
RayA75's testimony that lumpysolo is not in russia
Clearly, lumpysolo was neither Russian nor did he know it.
As the days went by, my quest to finding out about lumpysolo's past eventually ended, with many precious loots gathered along the way.
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...45#post4878045
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...80#post4890480
http://forum.toribash.com/showpost.p...0&postcount=12
http://forum.toribash.com/showpost.p...6&postcount=14
http://forum.toribash.com/showthread...05#post5371305
With all this information, I wish to end my post with an act of mercy. If lumpysolo is capable of producing enough evidence to prove that this thread is bollocks, I will publicly apologize to both him and the community before posting uncountable amounts of cocks throughout the forum, ultimately resulting in my permanent ban.
It was an honor to serve this great community today, and with that I say goodbye.
Last edited by Solax; Apr 17, 2012 at 12:29 AM.
Reason: fixing links
<&Fish>: did you just infract the toribot?
<&Fish>: you're fired
<&Fish>: you're fired
<JSnuffMARS> sounds like a drug-addiction or mastu(I'll censor that word)
<bishopONE>: also yeah fisting
<mwah> Gynx is it true you got admin over hero because hes from pakistan
And...posted. Have fun, mentlegen.
Last edited by sid; Apr 16, 2012 at 02:40 PM.
<&Fish>: did you just infract the toribot?
<&Fish>: you're fired
<&Fish>: you're fired
<JSnuffMARS> sounds like a drug-addiction or mastu(I'll censor that word)
<bishopONE>: also yeah fisting
<mwah> Gynx is it true you got admin over hero because hes from pakistan
O_o
I could use a Latin teacher.
Mei fati dominus, mei animi dux
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Thorn
Wiggi must love me forever now.
