Ranking
Actually happened this weekend.

At a friends wine farm sitting on a parked electric golf cart(unbeknownst to me, the owner had removed the soft start limiter, upped the power and broken the ignition so it couldnt be turned off.) and a friend sat next to me and jokingly put her foot on the accelerator, we launched, practically wheelied through a partly opened sliding door, my knee getting stuck between the door and the cart, into the wine cellar, and through a wall of empty wine barrels and tables, again my knee getting caught between the barrels and the cart.
At which point i apparently managed to get my foot onto the brake, where I somehow ripped out one of my toe nails.

It was one of those things where so much could have gone wrong, had the barrels fallen on top of us instead of to the sides, had the sliding door been closed, or had the sharp AF machete that was on the dash come loose, had i missed the brake, things could have ended pretty badly.

Instead, my knee is a little sore and Im missing a toe nail and the girl doesnt have a scratch on her.
It was hilarious.


No wine bottles where harmed in the telling of this story.
Last edited by BenDover; Jan 10, 2017 at 03:42 PM.
-=Art is never finished, only abandoned=-
last year around Halloween i was learning to butterfly knife and i did it wrong, you can guess what happened next.
Le 8 years old me going home with my babysitter on the bus, I fall asleep and when it's time to get off the bus my babysitter doesn't wake me up fully. I was walking while still asleep and hit the corner of a building opening my head as a result.
Wolololololo
When i was 3 or 4 years old i acidently put hot/boiled water on my left leg and now i have a big scar around my left thigh, starting from the top until the knee.
My friend dared me to skate down this hill and jump off at the end. But, i had to resist the momentum at the end and not move my feet at all. I ain't no pussy so i did it and i fucked up my hip.

First day of art class in the 8th grade, i sliced my wrist with an exato knife. I also tried to play the knife game with a box cutter.

last one is when i jumped into a pool when I was 4 and didn't know how to swim lol.
when i was in second grade i was i a handball game tournament in my class and i got knocked out by the ball. but it was hit by another second grader
i couldnt see for like 5 minutes
When I was 7 I was playing outside and threw my ball behind me, when I turned around I somehow slammed my head on a rail and split my head clean open, I'm 13 now and I still feel the scar on my head.