Today was one of those days, you sit back and think about how you life sucks dick. I attempted to commit suicide with a butter knife and some laxatives...

Continuing with the story... I was chillen with my boys last night (sorry for no story) so I woke up and whatever, and had a really bad headache and was pretty stoned still somehow. I went down stairs and to my surprise all my pals were sitting down at the table being served pancakes. I noticed a sharp... tangy smell. A mix of butter and pancakes and bacon and stuff. But I knew this smell from somewhere. I ate, cleared the table and proceeded to take a shit, when I noticed the smell followed me. I knew what this smell was. I had shit my pants. Now it wasn't a log or anything. I must have pushed to hard trying to fart. You see, this is what really confused me. I cleaned up, took a shower and went upstairs. The smell was in the room still. I looked around for any stains but of course I didnt find any. I asked my pals to check for any shit stains in there pants. So they did. Ryan, one of two of my friends, had shit himself too. Travis, the other friend, said that me and my friend ryan had a fart contest. And that I lost really bad.

This is how I spend my nights I guess.

I send dick pics.