Just purchased and they're very hard to play with because the hands don't change when you grab/ungrab so it's completely impossible to know whether you're grabbing or not

If having it shrink/flatten when grabbing is fine, then its doable

absolutely, but as of right now it does nothing and its impossible to play with

Anyway you can just press v 2 times to reset both grabs and you can play from there

If they were both grabbing though this would result in them both ungrabbing and grabbing again