dropping the shitposting tone i take with the messages i send on this forum for a second to say that i think its very telling how willing most of you are to dogpile on me for retaliating for the shit i've had to put up with my entire time playing this game. like did no one see or care how much i complained about being sexually harassed on this game just for being a woman, the kinds of things people would say to me made me feel incredibly unsafe in a game i'd been playing for ongoing 10 years. as a life long victim of sexual violence i genuinely just cannot put up with being hit on or poked at sexually in any way because of my childhood trauma. i know that you dont care about a random tidbit about just some toribash users life but to me any time i was reminded of sex it took me back to that hell place. never do i ever want to be reminded of what i have had to go through as a child but every day in my favorite game people would force me to remember it by saying disgusting things to me just because im a girl. the few staff members who were willing to help me with these kinds of issues are gone now. personally i would not trust someone who engages with drawn porn of underaged girls, or someone who makes attempts to humanize those who commit vile acts on innocent children. after being humiliated in a public server because i was groomed when i was trying to tell a concerned mother who took the keyboard and asked something like "is this game okay for kids?". at the time i was sortof friends with ancient and i mentioned it to him and reported the people initiating it and nothing ever happened from it. no one was punished for ruining my day and sending me spiraling into a panic attack because well who wants to be laughed at for being targeted by a known sexual predator who was somehow allowed in toribash clan discords. because its my fault that i didnt know mrmiyagi had a habit of sexting underaged girls, and was just gonna do it to me in the main chat. ez dodge or bad imo. after i had cashed out of the game on my main account i made it my mission to just be a pain in the ass. mainly because i wanted to play the game i still enjoyed but also now that i didnt have like 400 bucks in my inventory i could lose for being a prick i could release my frustrations on the community that was constantly reminding me of the last thing i wanted to think about in my entire life. i wanted to see how it would look if i spoke my true feelings about the people who play this game. the answer i see now disgusts me. any one of you could have done something to help me with the issue of being sexually harassed daily. none of you chose to. the only times i remember someone helping me is samurai before he was staff, athin, and piss. to them i owe a lot of gratitude of course, but the small number of people who were willing to see that i was struggling is really really telling. and its more telling to see how you all treat me when i take off my filter of "fitting in". i know clearly that i have broken rules a lot of the time, and im not saying that im exempt from all rules because i have trauma, i mainly broke rules for fun because i just do not care anymore. but i feel very strongly that i have been treated unfairly. not that any staff members have enough of a moral compass to see that seeing as how they might as well just start embracing it the way they have ignored everything. even when i was staff i felt powerless to punish people who had been causing me so much of these awful thoughts. i was scared i would be banfired for admin abuse. you could probably understand why i would be so anti-everyone when i shitpost on here, because it feels like every single person in this community is constantly working against me and trying to make me suffer. every day i played the game i love to be reminded of my personal hell and no one cared. and thats why you see me schitzo posting on here saying shit like i want you all dead!!! its because 1. i think its funny 2. i hate most of you 3. i gots problemz :P and ur an asshole for not letting a girl be silly and have fun :33333