Original Post
The story title doesn't take priority over the story itself!
Jonathan was handsome. Very handsome. Oh so very handsome. In fact, he is so handsome he can not start his day without checking himself out from the mirror first. It's an act that takes priority even over breakfast. Unfortunately it's also why he tends to be late from any morning appointments, but that doesn't shake him too much, as handsome men obviously live in their own time.

Today however, Jonathan had no early appointments, as he was still on vacation. This meant that Jonathan could check himself out from the mirror for as long as he wished - at least until his hunger started being unbearable. But still, admiring his breath-taking looks always comes first, no exceptions.

After his morningly self-checks, Jonathan went for breakfast. Ah, currant porridge from handpicked currants mixed with milk. The milk waters down the strong taste of the currants and brings a special kind of softness. The softness that should always be present in breakfasts! The taste is magnificent, definitely worth the praise! Jonathan felt regret over the fact that he couldn't name this tasty comestible to his own name.

While eating, Jonathan started pondering. What other reasons are there for his greatness? Obviously his incredibly handsome appearance is the first and foremost...

"Grats, you're now a legend!"

"Hey, thanks man! That has been obvious to me for as long as I can remember, but it doesn't hurt to have someone reminding me that!"

Usually, when someone faces a situation where he is abruptly congratulated for becoming a legend, the normal, general reactions in order would be 1) doubting that the voice was calling to him, 2) realizing after approximately 4.7 seconds that the voice was, indeed, calling to him, 3) doing a bemused expression, and finally, 4) nervously saying "what," most likely in an embarrassing, high-pitched voice.

But nothing like that happened to Jonathan. In fact, it could be said that the exact opposite happened to him: He deduced what was said was told to him, made a wide smile filled with joy, and responded accordingly. This all happened in an instant, as if he had practiced this in advance. Which in fact he did publicly in front of the reflections of the windows when he was still in comprehensive school. This resulted to everyone marking him as the weirdo of the school.

It took Jonathan exactly 4.7 seconds to realize that the situation wasn't normal. The voice wasn't normal, that is. He lives alone in a 28 square meter apartment and surely nobody would pick his door open. See, it's locked. So, what was the voice in his head?

"That's right! I must have become a superhero!" Jonathan proclaimed out loud, standing up from the chair and swinging his left arm all the way up, pointing to the ceiling. "That voice was most likely my spider senses or something," he thought. "Wait... Does this mean I can fly now!?" Without further ado, he crouches, bringing his arm down and curling both arms to his sides and fisting his hands. He gathers his energy to his feet, or at least imagines so, and... Lifts off! With a mighty, powerful jump, his right arm stretched above him just like Superman, he flies... To about 56 centimeters in the air, and then falls down safely on his two feet.

It takes Jonathan about 4.7 seconds to realize with an audible "Damnit!" that he didn't fly through the roof and see the horizon stretching in front of his eyes, just like he had imagined. Ah man, that didn't quite work out. And he was so excited, too.

Keep trying, Jonathan!

Last edited by ed; Oct 13, 2014 at 09:46 PM.