Holy $#!+ ... I have no idea what this place is even about, nor do I know what it is exactly that I'm supposed to do...

This 'place' is the ToriBash Forums.
A place in which people who enjoy the online internet game 'ToriBash' come to socialise.
You can do many things here, such as join or create your own clan so you can meet new users and proceed to play ingame with them.

I may be going too deep here, but you seem to be in need of a little guidence, so -
Basically, you have sections, topics and posts.
If you visit the main page, you'll see about 10 sections or so. Some of these include; News, Discussion and Off-topic.
Within these sections you'll find the topics, topics are just subjects people want to talk about.
If you click on one of these topics, you'll see a whole bunch of posts or as it's usually called - a 'thread' ..posts are basically just user's opinions on the said topic.

Before you begin posting, though, there is a few rules you'll have to follow first.
You can find these rules here: http://forum.toribash.com/showthread.php?t=331097
If you need anymore help, you can send me a PM (Private Message) by my username and then clicking 'Send a Private Message to WickedHayo.'
Hope I helped!

hello